Try using full fat milk.If there is a bunch of whey then you may have fermented it too long. Get it into another jar (minus the grains) as soon as you see the whey forming. Then let it ferment without the grains for a day. Stir it up and voila…
The grains will separate or clump and it really doesn’t matter. Works the same either way.
Mine took about 2 weeks to start growing noticeably. After that they started growing much faster. Fresh milk every 24 hours helps.
You don’t have to wash them very often at all. Maybe every 5 months or so but it isn’t strictly necessary. Don’t use tap water though. It won’t kill them but it aint good for them.
Experiment with it too. They’re very resilient so don’t be shy.