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This is truly difficult for you. I remember having it tough with breastfeeding and fighting for this right while everyone thought I should have given up. One of my twins would not breastfeed, while other would eat it all. I pumped for 6 months so that they would have my milk. Still, I remember crying when I stopped as I was still not sure that I wanted to stop. With several breast infections, bruised nipples from the pump and constant fighting for the milk supply I just couldn’t deal with it (and everyone trying to influence me on what I should or should not do) so I stopped. Now, you have opposite opinions and must make a decision, but you are the only one who can make it. Evaluate the risk and if you are ready to accept it and just stick with it. You are the one who will make the best decision for your baby, none of us.
My girls also have candida overgrowth. I am sure that I passed it on to them. Whether it was through my milk or some other way, what’s done it’s done. I am somewhat glad that last year I was ill until I realized I have pretty bad candida overgrowth and probably have some form of it for around 25 years or more. I am glad this happened to me because it made me understand that my girls have it also and for the past year I am changing their diet and habits slowly and hopefully they will learn to eat right and be healthy when they grow up. They are happy and healthy right now, but they do have some digestion problems, had some mild skin issues, smelly feet, bad breath etc. At first, I freaked out when I realized that they have it, but then I calmed down and now I am doing as best as I can to keep their health at good level.
Able is right, you should start your kids on home made kefir as soon as you can. Start with small amount first, see if there are any reactions. Your son will probably accept it if you introduce it to him now, try several times as kids often will refuse new taste, but might accept it after 4th or 5th try. My girls were 2 years old when they asked to try kefir (I started it as my treatment) and made some faces at first but soon they would drink “my medicine” so I started making extra for them. Now, it’s part of our diet and they demand it every day. Not sure how old your girl is, but perhaps it is not too late to get her started on it as well. It cannot hurt, it will only offer benefits to them.
Just do things slow and watch for reactions. It’s a bit tough as small kids cannot tell you of their symptoms, but you will be able to tell by how they act. My girls would be mean and wild if I feed them sugar or lots of starch. This was how I started realizing something was wrong. Then I started noticing some other symptoms. Then one of my girls had to take a round of antibiotics and she immediately got this rash like thing on her arm (which cleared with probiotics and kefir by the way) that was pealing and itchy.
Best of luck to you and I suggest you stay here as you will at least find lots of support on top of good information.